When you’re planning your wedding, it can be easy to focus on the details of the big day itself. But don’t forget about one of the most important parts: your guests. After all, they’re what make your day so special! One way you can show them how much you care is by addressing your wedding invitations in a thoughtful way that makes sure each and every person feels like they’re an integral part of the celebration. If you want to write stunning yet simple invitations that convey your love for the occasion and express how lucky you feel having everyone there with you, here are some tips to help get started:
Formal Addressing Etiquette Rules
There are a few rules you’ll want to follow, even if your wedding is on the casual side:
- Use formal names (no nicknames).
- Middle names aren’t necessary, but must be spelled out if used (no initials).
- Spell out all words such as Apartment, Avenue, Street, etc.
- Abbreviate Mr., Mrs., Ms. and Jr.
- Write out professional titles such as Doctor or Professor.
Addressing Wedding Invitations: Examples
We’ve covered the basics of addressing wedding invitations, but as with all things wedding, there are exceptions and variations. Below are some examples of how to address different types of wedding invitation envelopes:
How to Address a Wedding Invitation to a Single Person
If you are inviting a single person that has a title, such as a doctor or professor, you will address the envelope to the person by the title they hold. For example:
Dr. John Smith or Professor Jane Doe
If you are inviting someone who is married but does not use their husband’s last name (e.g., Dr. John Smith), then follow these guidelines:
- Addressed to: Dr/Mr Robert Smith
- Inside Address: Mr and Mrs Robert Smith (or Ms and Mrs)
To a Single Female
Use “Ms.” if she is over age 18. If she is younger, then “Miss” is the acceptable choice; it should be spelled out, not abbreviated as an initial.
- Outer envelope: “Ms. Stephanie Chen” or “Miss Stephanie Chen” (if she is younger than 18)
- Inner envelope: “Ms. Chen” or “Miss Chen” or “Stephanie”
To a Single Male
Use “Mr.” if he is over 18. Otherwise, no title is necessary.
- Outer envelope: “Mr. James Montgomery”
- Inner envelope: “Mr. Montgomery” or “James”
How to Address a Wedding Invitation to a Family (Including Children)
In invitations addressed to children under 18 (under 18), the outer envelope is reserved for their parents’ names. On the inner envelope, you should include the names of each child. You can use Miss” for girls under 18. Boys don’t need a title until they’re 16—then they can be addressed as “Mr.”
By not including the name of each child, you are meaning that they are not invited. However, do not be surprised if some guests mistakenly assume their kids are welcome. If you are concerned this will happen to your guests, ask your immediate family and wedding party to spread the word that the wedding will be reserved for adults and add this message to your wedding website. Please follow up with guests who don’t receive the message via phone to explain the situation.
When inviting an entire family, the family name or the parents’ names should be listed alone, and everyone can be included on the inside.
- Outer envelope: “The Thompson Family” or “Mr. and Mrs. Alan Thompson” or “Mr. Alan Thompson and Mrs. Emily Thompson”
- Inner Envelope: “Alan, Emily, Roger, Chance, Miss Jennifer, and Miss Lily”
How to Address Wedding Invitations to Children 18+
When it comes to addressing wedding invitations for children 18 or older, there are some additional things that you’ll want to take into consideration.
If your wedding is going to include adult children of the bride and groom who live at home (or if they’re just young), be sure to send them their own invitation. You can use the same format as the one you used for their parents’ invitations. But don’t worry about titles—it’s more important that they receive their own invitation than what form it takes.
For example: Mr., Mrs., Miss/Ms., Dr., etc., should all be left off unless there are multiple siblings who are married or have PhDs (or other titles). In this case, “Dr.” may be added after each last name on the envelope (e.g., John Smith & Dr Jane Smith).
This is because each child will receive an invitation with their own name on it—just like everyone else invited! For example:
- On the outer envelope: Ms. Audrey Abraham
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On the inner envelope: Ms. Abraham
How to Address a Wedding Invitation to a Married Couple
If you’re inviting a married couple, put their names on the same line. You’re free to forgo titles and list the names separately (as shown below in example two). If they have different last names, list the person you’re closest with first. If you’re equally close with them, go in alphabetical order. Or, if one person has taken the other person’s name, you can address the invitation to reflect that (shown below in example one).
To a Married Couple With the Same Last Name
For a heterosexual couple, use “Mr.” and “Mrs.” and spell out the husband’s first and last name. For a same-sex couple, either name can go first.
- Outer envelope: “Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Warren”
- Inner envelope: “Mr. and Mrs. Warren” or “Thomas and Michelle”
Many modern women may have a strong aversion to having their name left out and lumped in with their husbands. If you are a couple that is sensitive to this:
- Outer envelope: “Mr. Thomas Warren and Mrs. Michelle Warren”
- Inner envelope: “Mr. Warren and Mrs. Warren” or “Thomas and Michelle”
To a Married Couple With Different Last Names
For a heterosexual couple, write their names on the same line with the woman’s name first; if the combined names are too long to fit on one line, list them separately.
- Outer envelope: “Ms. Maria Stevens and Mr. David Estevez”
- Inner envelope: “Ms. Stevens and Mr. Estevez” or “Maria and David”
To a Married Couple With One Hyphenated Last Name
In the case of a spouse who has chosen to hyphenate their last name, then they should be addressed using the following:
- Outer envelope: “Mr. Marcus Craft and Mr. Brian Crosby-Craft”
- Inner envelope: “Mr. Craft and Mr. Crosby-Craft” or “Marcus and Brian”
To Same-Gender Couple
Order same-gender couples’ names alphabetically by last name. On the outer envelope, write each formal title and name on a separate line. On the inner envelope, drop the first names and refer to each invitee using their title and last name.
- Outer envelope: “Mr. Dan Brown and Mr. John Smith” / “Mrs. Amanda Jones and Mrs. Jane Williams.”
- Inner envelope: “Mr. Brown and Mr. Smith” or “Dan and John” / “Mrs. Jones and Mrs. Williams” or “Amanda and Jane”
How to Address a Wedding Invitation to an Unmarried Couple
If you’re wondering how to address invitations to an unmarried couple, it’s slightly different than a married couple’s envelope format. Both names should still be on the envelopes, but both names get their own lines in this case. Invitations to a couple who are unmarried but live at the same address are addressed to both people on one line. List the person whom you are closest to first.
- Outer envelope: “Mr. Stanley Kim and Ms. Amanda Rhee”
- Inner envelope: “Mr. Kim and Ms. Rhee” or “Stanley and Amanda”
How to Address Wedding Invitations to Those With Distinguished Titles
To a Married Couple, One of Whom Is a Doctor
If the combined names are too long to fit on one line, list them separately. Spell out “doctor” on the outer envelope, and abbreviate it on the inner.
- Outer envelope: “Doctor Tami Takata and Ms. Christina Smith”
- Inner envelope: “Dr. Takata and Ms. Smith” or “Tami and Christina”
To a Married Couple, Both of Whom Are Doctors
In the case of married doctors, it is proper to use: “The Doctors.”
- Outer envelope: “The Doctors Smith” or “Drs. Matthew and Angela Smith”
- Inner envelope: “The Doctors Smith” or “Matthew and Angela”
In the case of married doctors and one has chosen to hyphenate: If both titles don’t fit on one line, indent the second line.
- Outer envelope: “Doctor Matthew Smith and Doctor Angela Griggs-Smith”
- Inner envelope: “Dr. Smith and Dr. Griggs-Smith” or “Matthew and Angela”
To a Couple With Distinguished Titles Other Than Doctors
It is the same rule you apply to military personnel, judges, reverends, etc. If both titles cannot fit on one line, insert the second line. It is important to remember that whoever outranks the other (for example, a doctor, sailor, or military member) goes first regardless of gender.
- Outer envelope: “The Honorable Josephine Wood and Mr. Jonathan Wood” or “Captains Josephine and Jonathan Wood, US Navy”
- Inner envelope: “Judge Wood and Mr. Wood” or “The Captains Wood”
How to Address a Wedding Invitation to Friend
Friend with Known Guest
List your friend first, regardless of gender, and their guest on the line below. On the inner envelope, drop the first names.
- Outer envelope: “Mr. Stanley Kim Miss. Amanda Rhee” – on a separate line
- Inner envelope: “Mr. Kim Miss Rhee” – on a separate line.
Friend with Unknown Guest
On the outer envelope, write the invitee’s formal title and name. On the inner envelope, include “and guest.”
- Outer envelope: “Miss Stephanie Chen and Guest”
- Inner envelope: “Miss Chen and Guest” or “Miss Stephanie and Guest”
Addressing Wedding Invitations: FAQs
What is the best way to address wedding invitations in one envelope?
We’ve covered how to address inner and outer wedding envelopes together, but what if you only send one envelope? If so, all invited parties should be clearly stated. This includes guests that are typically only listed in the envelope, such as plus-ones and children. If you have limited space, you can replace children’s individual names with the words “and Family” or simply choose “The Abraham Family.”
Do you have to address your wedding invitations by hand?
When you invite your wedding guests by hand, it is a nice touch, but it isn’t necessary. The process of assembling invites is complicated on its own, so we understand if you want to print guest address labels at home or buy pre-printed envelopes with your stationery. How about another way to effectively address wedding invitations without fuss? You can hire a local calligrapher to do it for you.
How do you order guests’ names on wedding invitation envelopes?
An old-fashioned etiquette question is what name to list first when addressing wedding invitations. Today, there is no hard and fast rule and gender-based decisions aren’t necessary. Couples choose to list the person they are closest to first followed by that person’s partner, while others opt for alphabetical order. It’s up to you whether you want to follow one (or none) of these guidelines. The only exception is when there are distinguished titles involved. In this case, the highest-ranking person should be named first.
Where do you put guests’ names on wedding invitations?
The names of the guests are not written on the invitations, as per standard wedding invitation wording. You must address your loved ones only on outer and inner envelopes. You don’t need to print each household invitation you send them to.
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Conclusion
We hope you’ve found this guide helpful, and that it’s given you some ideas for your own wedding invitations. Remember, there are no hard and fast rules when it comes to addressing wedding invitations. But the most important thing is to make sure the message of your invitation comes across clearly, and that it reflects how you want your guests to feel about attending your event. Use our advice as a starting point for what works best for you!
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